Having a healthy sex life is always important. In the end, sex is a fundamental part of our human condition, and just as we seek other areas of life such as food and work, it is worth paying attention to our privacy. With or without a partner, sex life is important because it impacts our development, both physically and psychologically. It is not just about provoking pleasure or procreation, but about knowing yourself.
Gibray Aminjoab, independent sexologist, tells me that “the first thing we must consider is that each person is different and although these tips will be useful, it is worth consulting a sexologist to solve specific questions or problems, as for some It may be pleasant, for others not. “
Goodbye to prejudices and know your body to have a healthy sex life!
“Most of us have some kind of prejudice in mind,” says Gibray. With ideas like “you must not touch your body”, “sex is only for procreation”, “the important thing is that he enjoys”, you can hardly give yourself a hundred.
The specialist adds that “part of saying goodbye to prejudices in sex is allowing you to know your body. We are not used to looking in the mirror; I mean to really look at each part because although we have all seen an illustration of the penis or the vulva, we may not even be able to locate each part in us and this is fundamental. If as a man or as a woman, you take the time to look at yourself, to touch yourself, to feel and discover what you like or do not like. It will be much easier to develop yourself “.
And it makes all the sense, because if before you “do not take an eye and a hand”, you will discover in full action that something you do not like and could be uncomfortable or even affect you in later relationships.
“An extra when it comes to knowing your body is the possibility of detecting an abnormality and thus, discovering some kind of disease in time. If you know your body, any pellet or rash will be easier to differentiate, “explains Gibray.
Set limits and ask what you want for healthy sex life
The sexologist says that communication is essential to have a healthy sex life and comes from the hand of knowing your own body. “You must not allow anything that you do not like. Regardless if you are with a stable partner or in an isolated sexual encounter, you are in all your right to express what you do not like, “says the specialist.
On the other hand, he mentions that “every sexual encounter is unique: we do not all like the same things. In private, people do not have a crystal ball, so you cannot expect your partner to know if you like or are excited by something in particular. You must say it and ask for it, there is nothing wrong with that. “
Maybe because of what magazines show us, movies, TV and some other media, or what we hear. We think that the other person should know exactly how we like it or that if we do not get pleasure it is because the other person does not know how to excite us, but This idea is quite wrong. Maybe it can hurt you, but if you leave it aside and ask for just what you want, your sex life will benefit.
Information, a key piece in healthy sex life
“When we do not know something related to sex, we hardly advise with an expert. The most common is to go with a friend to ask how they do it, but we return to the same thing: each person is different and what they have found effective, may not work for you, “says the specialist.
And is that we are realistic, how many of us gave us a class on sex, on how to have a healthy sex life, on the wide variety of things that are in the world of sex and on how to enjoy?
“Going to the sexologist is essential if you have doubts or want to improve your sex life,” says Gibray.
The information about what you like, your body, the different ways of living sexuality, the precautions you must have (sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy, contraceptive methods, etc.), the toys that exist and what they are used for, among others Sex issues you can know them better if you attend with a specialist.
Do not use sex as a way to escape!
Having sex for pleasure, without involving a relationship or love has absolutely nothing wrong. We all have the right to have fun and get pleasure, the problem lies when we act under prejudice and not only ours, also society.
The sexologist indicates that “there is nothing wrong with wanting sex without any kind of bond. The problem lies in doing so by not wanting to be in solitude, by escaping some internal or external problem. If we do it for the wrong reasons, then a feeling of emptiness may come. You must be clear about why you do it and be certain of what you want. “
Listening to Gibray I remembered some moments of my life in which the sadness and a certain degree of loneliness after a break led me to casual encounters, that although they were not a bad experience, they made me feel worse and I did not even enjoy the encounter a hundred, I did not get over my problem. So watch out, with the reasons that lead you to make your decision.
The decision is always yours
“Choosing to have sex is a decision entirely yours. You should not base yourself on whether your partner wants to or not, or if all the people around you do it. None of these is a reason to do something. You decide when, how, where and with whom. If you do it by pressure or to satisfy your partner, the experience may not be the same. “
So, no matter how much desire the other person has, it is your body and, therefore, your decision. Also, doing it when you want will make you enjoy it to the fullest, and if we add the previous recommendations, without a doubt the result will be much more satisfactory and you will enjoy a healthy sex life.
Keep your sex life healthy and happy!
It seems obvious the previous thing, but you have begun or not your sexual life, the reality is that we know little our body; no matter your orientation or sexual identity, it is fundamental to take the time to get to know you inside and out.
Thinking about the sexologist only as an option when we have a problem is wrong. Going to some sessions before starting our sexual life or once started, can help us to obtain more satisfactory sexual relationships and, why not make our partner happier.
Nobody teaches us to have sex and a lot of what we know or think we know comes from the experience or things we see on the internet, so why not go with an expert? The least that can happen to us is to realize that we can enjoy even more what is already happening and thus have a super satisfying, happy and healthy sex life.